We went to beach in this Sunday with family friends.
Preparing all the wear and stuff is quite bothering especially to my wife, but feeling she on the beach is one of the greatest experience.
But this time, there’s a lot of Yakuza visited to Moriya kaigan.
It was scared a bit.

I understand there’s no “meaning” in the world as we, human being, just discover the meaning from a lot of things.
If there’s death of people, we discover the meaning and especially people who close to the deceased will find out huge and wide meaning for the event.

But if all the people died, no one will find out the meaning.
It’s just nothing.

I understand the logic, but on the other hand, we are the living animal automatically discovering the meaning.
Not finding out the meaning is not possible as it just means we need to have complete control on our emotion and instinct.

This contradiction itself is the joy of life, and also struggle and pain of life.
I just wanted to be freed up but I don’t want to the any experience which cause pain or fear.

My daughters will start their summer vacation in 1 week.

In the past, my wife and daughters go to her hometown as soon as possible after the summer vacation starts.
But this year, my elder daughter will have summer classes of private school.
And she only has 8-9 days off surprisingly.
Each day, the private school is arranged only in morning, but same kind of summer vacation is not possible this year due to the limited days off.

Still we will go back to each home town in Obon period.
But biggest problem is I can’t stay in home alone in summer time.
That was kind of special experience for me and only possible in summer vacation period.
Now it’s going to be impossible as well.

But when I consider it from different POV, I come to know that such kind of past vacation will be not common as well even without private school.
When I was child, I have sports activity every weekend, and more in vacation period.
When it comes to junior high school student, staying 3 weeks in home town is already not common.

It’s a good time and we can find free environmental sounds on the internet.
I’m just listening the sound of rain, and it’s comfortable to read books.

Read the book by 中島らも again.
Actually I didn’t remember the exact content.
But after finishing it, I understand that I did indeed read the book long before.

Actually this is something unique feeling.
The trigger for this feeling is not so easy to pull, so the preparation for this feeling is not so easy.
You have to read the good book first, then you have to wait 10-20 years so that memory to fade.

It’s always good to read the good books again.