一人飲みを楽しんでいることについて

本投稿は「mstdn.beer Advent Calendar 2025(https://adventar.org/calendars/11508)」17日目の記事になります。

はじめまして

今年4月に mstdn.jp から引っ越してきました。https://mstdn.beer/@three_eight
888 (スリーエイト)と申します。

SNS では主に壁打ちをして生きていますが、話しかけられたらお返事するようにしています。
はじめましての方、よろしくお願いします。

私生活では妻がいて、娘が2人の4人家族で生活しています。
40代に入ってからも、価値観の変化を感じながら、日々頑張って生きています。

何を書こうか…と悩む

勢いでアドベントカレンダーに登録しましたが、アドベントカレンダーに記事を書くのは初めてです。
それどころか、このブログで英語日記をたまに書くようにしていましたが、SNS も日記も基本的に壁打ちスタイルなので、人様に読んでいただくことを意識して私生活で何かを書くというのが生まれて初めてかもしれません。

今年は読書に打ち込んだので、読んだ本のことを書こうか。
日々色々読んでいる、買ってよかったものについて自分が書く側になってみようか。
もともとTwitter等では本名+顔写真で SNS をやっており、 mstdn.jp は匿名でのSNS 参加が初だったので、普段かけないようなことを書き散らしていたので、そういったことを書こうか。

最近、Gemini にいろんなことを聞くことが多く、どんなことを聞いてどんな感じのことを教えてもらっているのかを紹介しようか。
意識高く仕事について書こうか。外資系で働いており、日本人一人のチームなのでそこで感じるカルチャーギャップについて書こうか、など色々と悩みました。

一人飲みについて

と、色々悩んだのですが、ビア鯖に所属していることもありますし、毎週のルーティンである一人飲みについてつらつらと話してお茶を濁したいと思います。

私自身は 20代の中盤頃から一人飲みを嗜むようになり、常連さん付き合いなども積極的に参加する方で、妻も常連さんに紹介してもらって付き合いだし、結婚したというような背景があります。
この記事の趣旨とは外れますが、一人飲みは Twitterなどで頻繁にやっていたオフ会の延長な部分もあり、元々オフ会は社交性を身につけるためにやっていたという経緯もあります。

子どもが生まれてから自由に飲み歩ける頻度は減ってしまったのですが、週に1度の一人飲みを 7-8 年前から続けています。
お店は決まっており、自宅から歩いて10分ほどの焼き鳥屋さんに通っています。
40代後半の大将一人でやっている小さなお店で、安くて美味しく、お酒は濃いという呑兵衛の味方です。
色々と試してみたのですが、居心地の良さや味、リーズナブルさなどを併せ備えた場所というのはそれほど多くはなく、この焼き鳥屋さんに通い続けて一筋です。

焼き鳥屋さんへ通う頻度

結構長い間通っているので、通い方にも変化があります。
コロナ前は出社していたので、6時半ころから8時半くらいまで、特に決まった曜日はなく通っていました。

コロナ真っ最中は自粛期間があり行けなかったのですが、それも明けまして、再開後は近くにある子どもの塾のお迎えを兼ねて特定の曜日に6時から7時半くらいまで行っていました。
長女も大きくなり一人で帰れるようになったのですが、塾の送迎の流れで習慣としまして、今は毎週金曜日の5時くらいの早い時間から、7時前くらいまでを目安に楽しんでいます。

他のお客さんとの付き合い方

一人飲み自体は昔からやっているのですが、独身時代から変わったことというと、お店の人や他のお客さんとの付き合い方があります。

独身時代は比較的時間や予定が自由になったので、常連さんと仲良くなって時間を合わせて飲んだり、お店も積極的にイベントを打つお店だったので、誕生日会や常連さんたちとの集まりにも積極的に顔を出していました。
常連さんたちと別のお店にご飯を食べに行ったり、ちょっとしたイベントに参加してみるなどもしていました。
一回り以上年齢が上のお子さんがいらっしゃらない御夫婦が3組くらい常連さんとして来られており、その方たちは国内や国外も含めた旅行を、大人の遠足として楽しまれていたようです。

ただ、今はその日飲む時間も今後の予定も全て、自分の自由にとは行かなくなってきたので、話すきっかけがあればできるだけ楽しく話しますが、その場かぎりのお店だけのお付き合いを心がけています。
大将からも何度か飲みに誘われたのですが、お店が終わってから飲むという話でもあったので、実現してはいません。

幸いにも、おじいさんやおじさんが多く、誘惑や変な話とも無縁で一人飲みを楽しんでいます。
一つのお店に長く参加しながら、揉め事とは無縁なのも、ちょうどよい距離感のおかげなのかもしれません。

飲むお酒と頼むおつまみ

元々は1杯目から外がなくなるまで、ホッピーを愛飲していました。
よくある?のかはしらないですが、ジョッキに8割位焼酎を注いでくれるため、だいぶ効きます。
加齢のせいかお酒を飲むと眠くなる部分もでてきたので、ホッピーで酔っ払うと金曜日は9時半に子どもと寝てしまうことが多いです。



せっかくの金曜日の夜だし、もう少しゆっくり起きていたいなというときにはビールから初めて、焼酎のソーダ割り、トマトハイ、緑茶ハイなどを飲んでいます。

おつまみは、日替わりで2品が用意されているので、まずこのうちの一つを頼むことが多いです。
よだれ鶏、ニラ玉、ペラかつ、角煮、全ては思い出せないですが、たいていよその居酒屋さんで食べるより美味しいです。
これに、肉を鶏肉にして半熟卵をのせた肉豆腐がお店の定番メニューになっているので、これらで先程のお酒を二杯ばかり飲みます。



その後は焼き鳥を、レバー、ぼんじり、ハツモト、半熟卵のベーコン巻きなど4本ばかり頼み、もう2杯飲みます。
これらがルーティンになっています。

40代になって

つらつらと毒にも薬にもならない話を書いてきましたが、この何の変哲もないお酒を飲みに行く行為が、大事な人生の一分になっています。

40代になって、どちらかというと人生も残った時間のほうが短くなってきました。
残り少なくなっていって追加では得られない時間のほうが貴重になっていき、お金の価値とそれが反転していく実感があります。

仕事も、以前よりも責任やプレッシャーが大きくなってきたように感じます。
お賃金も増えてはいるのですが、自分に属する要素を全部ひっくるめて足し合わせると、0になるというか1になるというか、良いこともしくは悪いことだけがひたすら大きくなっているような感じはありません。
良いことが増えると、その分悪いことも増えるというような感じです。
人は慣れる生き物ですので、恵まれていても慣れていって、落ち着くところに気持ちも落ち着いていくのかもしれません。

そんな中で、一人飲みという自分自身がやりたいと思えることがあるということ、金曜日最高という気持ちがどんどんと強くなっていてそれを楽しむ自分なりの儀式になっているということ、そんなものが存在してくれているということが、ありがたく思えています。

まだ書き足りないようなこともある気もしますが、このあたりで筆をおいて、mstdn.beer Advent Calendar 2025 への寄稿とさせていただきたいと思います。
Happy Friday! の気持ちを大切にこれからも1人飲みを楽しんでいきます。

mstdn.beer Advent Calendar 2025

This is a flying start version of my article for mstdn.beer server’s advent calendar.
Usually, I write by myself in English, but the Japanese version of the article below is too long to rewrite in English, so I asked Gemini to translate.

I’ll publish the original Japanese version on 17th Dec and will link to the mstdn.beer Advent Calendar 2025.

—-

Hello everyone,

I moved here from mstdn.jp in April this year. https://mstdn.beer/@three_eight I don’t really have a handle or username, but if I had to say, I go by “Three Eight.”

On social media, I mainly live by “talking to the wall” (self-reflection/posting without expecting replies), but I always make sure to reply if someone speaks to me. Nice to meet you all!

In my private life, I am married and have two daughters. I try my best every day, navigating the changes in values I’ve felt since entering my 40s. I struggled with what to write… I impulsively signed up for the Advent Calendar, but this is my first time writing an article for one. Moreover, although I occasionally write English diary entries on this blog, those diaries are basically “talking to the wall” style, so writing something about my private life with the awareness that other people will read it might be the first time in my life.

Since I dedicated myself to reading this year, should I write about the books I read? Should I try being the one who writes about things I bought that turned out to be good, something I constantly read about? Originally, I used to do SNS with my real name + photo on platforms like Twitter, and mstdn.jp was my first time participating in SNS anonymously, so I was scattering thoughts I normally wouldn’t share. Maybe I should write about those things?

Recently, I’ve been asking Gemini various things a lot, so perhaps I should introduce what kind of things I ask and what kind of answers I get. Should I try to write ambitiously about my work? I work at a foreign-affiliated company and am the only Japanese person on my team, so I thought about writing about the culture gap I feel there. I had many things on my mind. About drinking alone… After much deliberation, and since I belong to the Beer server, I’ve decided to talk casually about my weekly routine of drinking alone, to fill the space.

I personally started enjoying drinking alone in my mid-twenties. I was quite active in socializing with regulars, and I even met, dated, and married my wife after being introduced to her by one of the regulars. Inevitably, the frequency with which I can freely go out drinking has decreased since my children were born, but I have continued my once-a-week solo drink for the past 7-8 years.

The place is fixed: a yakitori restaurant about a 10-minute walk from my house. It’s a small place run by a master in his late 40s alone. It’s cheap, delicious, and the drinks are strong—a true friend to drinkers. I’ve tried various places, but there aren’t many that combine comfort, taste, and affordability, so I’ve been loyal to this one yakitori place.

Frequency of Visits to the Yakitori Restaurant

Since I’ve been going for quite a long time, the way I visit has changed. Before COVID-19, I was going to the office, so I would visit between 6:30 PM and 8:30 PM, on no particular set day.

During the height of COVID-19, there was a self-restraint period when I couldn’t go, but once that lifted and the place reopened, I started going on specific days, combining the trip with picking up my child from their nearby cram school. My eldest daughter has grown up and can now go home alone, but now I enjoy my time there every Friday, starting early around 5 PM and aiming to leave before 7 PM.

How I Interact with Other Customers

While I’ve been drinking alone for a long time, one thing that has changed since my single days is how I interact with the staff and other customers.

When I was single, I had more freedom with my time and schedule, so I would make friends with the regulars and match our drinking times. The restaurant was also proactive about hosting events, so I actively attended birthday parties and gatherings with the regulars.

However, now I don’t have complete freedom regarding the time I drink that day or my future plans, so if there’s an opportunity, I chat as pleasantly as possible, but I try to keep the relationship limited to the time spent at the restaurant. The master has invited me for a drink several times, but since it was always for after the shop closed, it hasn’t materialized.

Fortunately, most of the customers are elderly men, so I can enjoy my solo drink without any unnecessary temptations or strange conversations.

Drinks and Snacks I Order

Originally, I was a devoted fan of Hoppy (a low-alcohol beer-like beverage mixed with shochu), drinking it from the first glass until the soto (Hoppy mixer) ran out. I don’t know if it’s common, but the master pours the shochu to about 80% of the glass, so it really packs a punch. Perhaps due to age, I’ve started feeling sleepy when I drink, so when I get drunk on Hoppy, I often end up sleeping with my children at 9:30 PM on Friday.

Since it’s Friday night and I’d like to stay up a bit longer, I often start with a beer, followed by shochu with soda, Tomato High, or Green Tea High.

For snacks, two daily specials are available, so I usually order one of them first. Yodare-dori (drooling chicken), Nira-tama (chive and egg), Pera-katsu (thin pork cutlet), Kakuni (braised pork belly)… I can’t remember all of them, but they are usually better than what I have at other izakayas. In addition to this, the shop’s staple menu item is niku-dofu (meat and tofu stew) where the meat is chicken, topped with a soft-boiled egg. I usually have two drinks with these items.

After that, I order about four skewers of yakitori: liver, chicken tail (bonjiri), heart base (hatsumoto), and bacon-wrapped soft-boiled egg, and then have two more drinks. This has become my routine.

Entering My 40s

I’ve been rambling on with a story that is neither poison nor medicine, but this utterly ordinary act of going out for a drink has become an important part of my life. Having entered my 40s, it feels like the remaining time in my life is now shorter. No one told me this, but I have a growing sense that time is becoming more precious, and its value is starting to reverse with the value of money.

I also feel that my job has come with greater responsibility and pressure than before. My salary has increased, but it’s like a zero-sum game, or maybe one-sum. If you add up all the factors related to me, the total is zero or one—there is no sense that only good or only bad things are growing significantly.

In the midst of this, the fact that I have something I genuinely want to do—drinking alone—and that the feeling of “Friday is the best” is getting stronger and has become my own personal ritual for enjoying it, the very existence of such a thing makes me feel grateful.

I feel like there might be more to write, but I’ll put down my pen here and submit this as my contribution to the mstdn.beer Advent Calendar 2025.

The release date is Wednesday, but… Happy Friday!

Advent Calendar

I’m not familiar with the culture of Advent Calendar, but this time I registered for mstdn.beer as I’m using the server.

When I think about it, I realize I didn’t have the opportunity to write a blog post or craft sentences for the audience to read.
All the writings in SNS and on this type of blog are basically the style called Kabeuchi.

But for the Advent Calendar, my writings will be for readers, and this is a very fresh experience for me.

Probably this is based on me.
I think I have a personality who don’t want to write for others.
I must admit this based on the fact that I have almost no experience with that.

When I was young, I imagined the future where I would be a (novel) writer.
But actually, the reality is opposite.

Anyway, I’ll take my time to consider the content for the Advent Calendar.
This is as a courtesy, and I will do my best.

Approaching to year-end shutdown

I thought the last year-end and the new year were just recent events.
But now another year-end season is approaching.

The Christmas season is the only time to have a long holiday together with foreign colleagues and customers.
So I like it.
For example, a public holiday in Japan is only off for Japanese people, so there can be progress and updates in the work
I will need to catch up on it.

This year, my older daughter will have only 2 days off due to a private tutoring school.
So we will not have the opportunity to visit our hometown.

The date for the exam is from 1st Feb to 4th Feb mainly.
So after the period, we will be able to enjoy overnight trip again.

Appliances

In Oct, I missed posting at least 3 blogs on this WordPress.
Taking time is not easy with gaming and reading, and taking care of my family.

2025 is the year to renew the home appliances.
I bought a laundry machine in Apr or so, and this time we replaced the refrigerator.
The vacuum cleaner was also broken, and got a new one.

For practice on the entrance exam for a private junior high school, I just ordered a printer, and it is expected to arrive today.
On top of that, we purchased Switch2, and our TV is also something wrong.

Hope we can use those new appliances for a long time.
I don’t waste my money in an unfortunate way.

Most Difficult

It’s difficult to control things that are out of control. Other human beings are definitely one of those things. This also applies to family.

This weekend, my older daughter stole money from my wife’s wallet. This wasn’t the first time; it was actually the second. We scolded her and talked to her at length about why stealing money is wrong. It will break the trust between us and make living together difficult.

Her motivation isn’t the point. She bought a lot of Genshin character goods, such as can badges.

I even told her she wasn’t good at being bad and that I was much better at it even when I was 10. But I’m not sure how I can change her mind, as she is an independent human being, even though she is still just a girl.

One thing’s for sure: I can’t give up on her. My ultimate wish is for my daughter’s happiness, but parenting is quite difficult. Just thinking about it won’t bring the answers.



New refrigerator

I bought a new refrigerator with my wife this weekend.
The current one is almost 12 years old, and a bit too small to use with a family of 4.
The new one is 1.5 times spacious.

This time, I bought it from the electronics retailer, Bic Camera.
Usually, I use internet shopping as it’s convenient and cheaper in most cases.

But a refrigerator is a kind of big appliance. There are several things to consider, and it’s a lot to handle by myself.
I just feel like maybe we can consult with the seller first.
Actually, the experience was good. Also, the price they suggested is competitive, even compared with internet shops.

The price was 29M yen, but with a 10-year warranty.
I’m looking forward to using it. A bigger freezer will be super useful.

No merit

This time, my company’s performance indicator for bonus was better than average. It’s 1.08.

My personal performance indicator is 1.28. This is good, though it’s not exceptional.
The top performer will have 1.35-1.45, though there are lots of politics and unique reasons that determine the numbers.

As usual, the sales and the profit were OK, and that’s the reason for the company’s performance indicator, but I got no merit increase.

Holistically, I’m satisfied as I got RSU again, so it’s 6 consecutive times, every 6 months.

One good news is that my team has 2 people promoted, even with the very restricted budget.
I’m a bit disappointed that the person promoted is not me, but anyway, it’s a good sign.
It also means the path to promotion for me is not blocked.

Bad Habit

Embarassingly, I have a bad habit: Nail biting since I was a child.
I almost gave up trying to stop the habit, but I bought a super-bitter manicure this time, and it worked like a charm.
On the 1st day, I still bit my nail without noticing it, but the bitter taste hit me.
Then, from the 2nd day, I was able to recognize the movement of my hand.

This is one amazing fact.
We can change ourselves even for a 30-year-old habit.
So anything can change.

Nothing new except for this.
The bonus was good, but my company has quite a stringent budget for merit increase and promotion this time.
But today, my manager gave me a letter including RSU. That’s really good and relieving.

I read the book by Shintaro Ishihara recently, which is a kind of autobiography.
Actually, I don’t like him, so I was reading it criticizingly, but the reading experience itself was somewhat interesting and valuable.
What he repeatedly wrote was miserable, but I just felt I might be able to like him once I met with him in person. but not able to confirm this thought.

boredom and motivation

I’ve been in my current role at my company for 4.5 years, and I’ve adjusted quite well to the circumstances.

Getting used to something inevitably brings a sense of boredom.
I’m wondering if there’s a more exciting opportunity for me internally or externally.

At the end of the day, money matters.
If I can get the same or more money with a job that’s less demanding and has a better work-life balance, that will be good.
I know that’s probably asking too much.

“At forty, I had no delusions.” is a famous phrase, but I doubt it, at least for me.
I’m still motivated, but my motivation is fading drastically.
It feels like I’m pressing the gas and the brake at the same time.

I don’t have time to elaborate, but family is also difficult.
I have delusions at 42.